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AE on Telly News (NEW CONCEPTS)
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Mick Harper
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In: London
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I take no interest in mass shootings but I thought it my duty, given the above, that I had better find out who this latest gunman was. I couldn't! I watched and I watched and I watched but everyone kept referring to 'the accused' and variants thereof. It might have been a bit spooky but as it happens I knew the reason. The formula we use in Britain is, "The accused is a juvenile and cannot be named for legal reasons." Shows remarkable promise for when he gets into senior high.
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Wile E. Coyote


In: Arizona
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I am going to take a long break from AE. I have made a big mistake in subscribing to Netflix, and I now discover that they have already produced a TV mini segment of my proposed tome. "The Boys Book Of Imaginary Battles." It is called "Age of Samurai" and features English-speaking academic talking heads, layered in grayish shadows, talking like effete ex mafiosi about mocked up medieval battle scenes performed by Japanese actors. These brilliant visual battle scenes feature incredible numbers of decapitations and are layered in spurting red gore, often in slo-mo. It's like "300" or "Sin City". Only much bloodier. Phwoar.

The narrator brings it all to life. Japan, a country disunified. Up comes a map. It is Japan. This is the Sengoku Period, civil war was rampant. Clan fights clan. Worse, family member fights family member. In the Owari Domain, the death of old man Oda Nobuhide has caused a power vacuum. His designated heir, Oda Nobunaga, is a bit bonkers. Cut away, he actually looks bonkers. Cut again to a talking head, he confirms, yes he is bonkers. You can now see the fear in the eyes of his family. Wow!! Red gore!! He beheads his brother, the stable one, the one who believed in tradition, the madman is in charge of the Owari. We move forward. Nobunaga then has sex with his bride to be, yikes she might be a spy for a rival clan. Cut to a female talking head, who tells us your couldn't trust anyone in those days. She might have added that this was particularly true of folks like Nobunaga who it appears was a paranoid psychopath who did not recognise the importance of getting in counselling, but this is left for the viewer to work out. That's the end of the bride.

Forward again, and it all gets much bloodier when Nobunaga discovers that muskets have been introduced into Japan and confer a tactical advantage over those like the noble Samurai that refuse to use them. A talking head from the shadows tells us that Nobunga is a military genius. Cut away to peasants firing muskets at Samurai. They are falling off their chargers. The talking head opines that the Samurai used perhaps the most deadly sword known to history, but Nobunaga discovered the superiority of the peasant and musket. Bastard.

This is the best TV ever.
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Ishmael


In: Toronto
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Wile E. Coyote wrote:
I am going to take a long break from AE. I have made a big mistake in subscribing to Netflix, and I now discover that they have already produced a TV mini segment of my proposed tome. "The Boys Book Of Imaginary Battles." It is called "Age of Samurai" and features English-speaking academic talking heads, layered in grayish shadows, talking like effete ex mafiosi about mocked up medieval battle scenes performed by Japanese actors. These brilliant visual battle scenes feature incredible numbers of decapitations and are layered in spurting red gore, often in slo-mo. It's like "300" or "Sin City". Only much bloodier. Phwoar.


I remember once being the only person on this forum who believed history nothing but lies.
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Mick Harper
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In: London
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You still are. Despite various AE injunctions. Never mind that, I've got a little job for you. As you know, nobody takes leave of the AEL and lives to tell the tale. I'm going to be sending you an Executive Action Pack (via Western Union) in respect of somebody who thinks he (or she) can. In your own time but soon.
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Wile E. Coyote


In: Arizona
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Ishmael wrote:
I remember once being the only person on this forum who believed history nothing but lies.


It's true I have become increasingly scriptosceptical. However "not beleiving" doesn't really interest me. Nor does showing the current chronology is 300 or 500 years out. There are folks out there who are reinventing an orthodox chronology, that are much better at it than Wiley. Anyway it bores me. Coyote had to go away and try and reinvent semiotics for himself, based on circular notions of time and space.
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Mick Harper
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In: London
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Line of Duty (BBC-1)

Thank God I don't live in Britain. According to their state broadcasting channel, the entire system of law and order is dependent for its probity on a chap called (Acting) Detective Inspector Arnott who is so flaky you could lick chocolate off him. Here in Uzbekistan we are laughing our zeidzas off.
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Wile E. Coyote


In: Arizona
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Don't write off the gaffer.


Detective chief constable: "Your enquiry into H should close. This isn't about old battles."

Ted:"The name's Hastings, ma'am, I'm the epitome of an old battle."
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Mick Harper
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In: London
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I missed that one! It may be that textual analysis is the order of the day for me, not enjoyment. Though since you a) believe there is a rank in the British police hierarchy called 'Detective Chief Constable' and b) still don't know the identify of H -- the whole of Uzbekistan is chortling about it -- I fear you yourself had better stick with enjoyment.
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Hatty
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In: Berkshire
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It was the best line, I agree. The only joke in a wearyingly bleak episode.
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Mick Harper
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In: London
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The Michelangelo Code Sky Arts Channel

Waldemar Januszcak comes up trumps (for once) in this two and a quarter hour epic that touches many of our bases. Recommended.
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Wile E. Coyote


In: Arizona
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Occupied

Damn Norwegians. They have been gifted huge oil and gas reserves, and got incredibly wealthy. That's fair enough, I couldn't give a toss. What really is unacceptable though is that they then decide to go all "enviromental", elect a Green Party and turn the tap off.

Are they grateful for help when we decide to turn their tap back on and save the world ?

Nope.

This is a case of Norwegians wanting the wealth and wanting to be all Greta Thunberg, at the same time. .

Bastards, I am with the Russians on this one.

"Come on you Reds." "Come on you Reds."
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