The Importance of Sport (NEW CONCEPTS)

[Mick Harper]

First, the bad news. The legendary Eurosport has gone defunct. Nobody knew how it was financed but anyway it no longer is and all the channels (up to twelve during Olympics) have gone off air.

Now the bad news. The contracts have been taken over by TNT. We feared the worse. Would this brash newcomer be sensitive to the heritage nuances of Eurosport's eclectic mix of minor sports and major sport competitions nobody else wanted? Well, it's kept the cycling intact so that's a start.

In fact, maybe it will improve things in one particular department. As you may know, nobody watches sport unless their team is involved. Or, in individual sports, whether a Brit is featuring prominently. Sky is currently demonstrating this with its daily hour and a half highlights package of the Masters. It seems only Justin Rose and McIlroy are taking part this year.

Eurosport has infuriated us all for years by refusing to tell us how the Brits taking part in a road race are doing. Maybe TNT will tell our hoity-toity, precious, 'we are not British, we are European', 'we love the sport, not the sportsman', cycling commentators to get real.

We're not interested in cycling, chaps, we're interested in our chaps.

[Mick Harper]

Rory McIlroy opened his third round at the Masters with 3-3-3-3-3-3. Blimey, I thought, I bet that's never been done before. 'That's never been done before,' said the commentator. Well done, both of us.

[Mick Harper]

Palace would have been three up against Man City (instead of 2-1 which inevitably meant 2-5) because the boy Eze had strayed offside despite 'looking across the line' as his team mate broke. This has AE implications.

In yon olden days, you kept on the shoulder of the last defender to stay onside. You were then caught out time and again when VAR came in and you found that while your shoulder was onside your toe wasn't. But Eze represents the first generation of tyro professionals who learned their football in the Age of VAR so he really had no excuse.

A young head on old shoulders.

[Boreades]

Animal stops play.

[Mick Harper]

When you were a lad it was that woman with bared breasts. I wonder whatever happened to her. And why her actions were not emulated by other suffragettes.

[Mick Harper]

It's April 12th, Leicester City haven't scored since January and who's been sitting on the bench all that time? Ruud van Nistelrooy!

Stanley Matthews played in England's top division aged 50. Fact.
Ruud van Nistelrooy is aged 48. Fact.
Mind you, Sir Stan existed on a diet of fish'n'chips and going for long runs in the park. Fact.

[Pete Jones]

[Mick Harper]

First Two Quarters

Both Villa and Dortmund were miles behind against PSG and Barcelona respectively, made stirring comebacks and could have squeaked it at the death. Has this given Real any hope of digging themselves out tonight against our intense pressing game? I can't see how. As La Passionara said in Madrid in 1936, 'No Pasarán!'

[Mick Harper]

According to various Arsenal reports from the Bernabeu, it is being taken as axiomatic by the locals that Real Madrid will overcome the three goal deficit from the away leg.

I read somewhere, some time ago, that this has never been achieved in senior Euro-competitions. Now maybe it has happened but it is certainly the case that it would be in the thousand-to-one bracket if it happened this time. I see no reason therefore for concern.

Of course it may happen but as an AE-ist I know (a) it won't and (b) if it does, to be philosophical about it. 'I wuz there' being a considerable consolation prize.

[Boreades]

[Mick Harper]

As I thought. Just the once and post when I filed it away. Cheers, Borry, your bogus lists are always a clincher.

[Boreades]

Of course, it didn't happen.

[Boreades]

Will they or won't they?

Real Madrid v Arsenal -
First leg Agg 0-3

[Mick Harper]

You will be pleased to hear, Borry, that Roger Mellie informed us that a three nil away deficit had been overcome four times in all since 1955. I was pleased to hear, "And Arsenal can stand proud tonite etc etc."

I don't suppose the match itself was much to write home about -- I had to go off and watch more diverting fare from time to time and watched the last half hour at double speed once the result was no longer in doubt--but at least one trauma was lifted for evermore. I am so used to Arsenal perishing at the hands of crafty dagoes in later rounds that witnessing us being the crafty dagoes was positively Nelsonian.

That does not mean for one moment that we will not be crushed by PSG, then by Barcelona, then by UEFA for cooking the books, then by a resurgent Spurs next season.

[Boreades]

According to the BBC