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The Canons of Culture (NEW CONCEPTS)
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Mick Harper
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In: London
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Disney can always cope with Latinos but would you accept a black Cinderella? I settled down the other day to watch a new version of Roald Dahl's The Witches. It's hard to muck up given the plot. They managed it (for me anyway) by casting a black child in the central role. My expectations were based on this

The Witches is a 1983 children's novel by British author Roald Dahl. A dark fantasy, the story is set partly in Norway and partly in England, and features the experiences of a young English boy and his Norwegian grandmother in a world where child-hating societies of witches secretly exist in every country. Wikipedia

The grandmother is black too, which took some doing in the Norway of yesteryear. But it has to be quintessentially English (and Norwegian) or it doesn't work at all. Unless you make it quintessentially US high school or whatever, which they hadn't. It was stage-Brit in all the other trappings.

My uncomprehending fury at the sheer pointlessness would probably have driven me away. Such blatant tokenism is close to racism. But to do it here, where it adds a fundamental difference between the boy and the straight world and between boy and witchworld had me wondering whether headmistress Anjelica Huston would turn out to be an alien from Planet Zog mistakenly recruited by the coven.

Although actually...
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Boreades


In: finity and beyond
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We're awaiting news of the woke remake of "Lord Of The Rings".

So far, it's fallen at the first. Deciding what word should replace "Lord".

After that, how to deal with the Hobbits.

The whole original plot line was obviously and stupidly masculine. All-male Hobbits that slog a long way across hostile territory, having to fight all the way against an obviously Slavik climate-changing villainous foe. Which delighted in chopping down the sacred Ents and forests. Only for the Hobbits to pass out on the side of Mount Doom, an erupting volcano, and having to be rescued by the Giant Eagles.

The remake will have female Hobbits, who will be far more sensible. Fly direct from The Shire to Mount Doom on the Giant Eagles, drop the Ring down the volcano from above, and be home in time for tea. Job done.
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