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The Importance of Sport (NEW CONCEPTS)
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Wile E. Coyote


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Mick Harper wrote:
Football is such a simple game.


The first thing that Mbappe did last night was to misplace a pass, the second thing he did was run offside. At which point the Tunisians, having seen his pace, decided to drop back 20 metres and double team him. The rest of the French team then had oodles of space.

The problem is that Kane is dropping furter and further back, and Sterling and Mount are not making runs into the space that Kane normally occupies. The opposition will therefore just occupy that space, and force England to play in a narrow strip from side to side.

If we play Rashford they will defend deeper.
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Mick Harper
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All of this is true in 'broken play' and accounts for why England score so few goals (or create so few chances) in proportion to their time of possession. You have reiterated my point about the dangers of having an undroppable player (and making him captain!) because his whim rules and Kane's whim is to be a midfielder skimming passes across the turf rather than doing his (relatively thankless) job of leading the line.

I take your point about Rashford except I would much rather it not be Rashford who gives the strong impression, every time he is on the ball, of not knowing what to do next. But perhaps not a problem if his main task is to be a decoy keeping defences honest.

However, in that regard, nobody ever seems to realise that defences are much more easily breached if they are passed through in parts of the pitch other than their own third. If my solution is adopted -- England players drift towards their own goal at the start of each passage of possession rather than hurtle like gadarene swine towards the opposition's -- this will be accomplished regularly and in reasonable security. England are that good. Could be that good.
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Mick Harper
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Justice Cocklecarrot's been on the blower again. Something about a FIFA reg that defenders are not allowed to brush the noses of multiple ballon d'or winners in the penalty area.

PS I was proved right about the Spain/Germany fix-up. I had been sworn to secrecy about the sub fix-up designed to get Germany out of the tournament.
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Mick Harper
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England's Route To The Finals

In copyright law (about which I have been obliged to become something of an expert in my varied career), there's something called the Great Ormonde Street exemption. This was to allow the kiddies' hospital of that name to enjoy the fruits of Peter Pan royalties when Hollywood shysters thought they could waltz off with them after the usual fifty years since J M Barrie's death. Oh no, you don't, suddenly it's seventy-five years.

What's this got to do with England's prospects in the world cup? That's pretty obvious surely. The copyright to the Laws of Football are held 'jointly and severally' as we legal johnnies call it by eight people sat round a table in an Accrington pub in the 1870's. The last of whom died only seventy-three years ago. So FIFA, either you use 'your best endeavours' to arrange for England to play Senegal, Poland in the quarters, Morocco in the semis and South Korea in the final, or you'll be hearing from Lord Justice Cocklecarrot.

Over to you, Gianni "Cry Baby, Moneybags" Infantino.
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Wile E. Coyote


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Mick Harper wrote:
I take your point about Rashford except I would much rather it not be Rashford who gives the strong impression, every time he is on the ball, of not knowing what to do next. But perhaps not a problem if his main task is to be a decoy keeping defences honest.



The player who does not know what he is doing is notoriously difficult to defend against. The defender is as clueless at the attacker. The only real sin in these "originals" is continually running offside, missing sitters and not passing to teammates in better positions, you just have to balance this against their goals.

Marcus is marmite. Harry is ketchup.
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Mick Harper
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The player who does not know what he is doing is notoriously difficult to defend against. The defender is as clueless as the attacker.

An excellent point I had entirely overlooked. I'm not the Pope, I'm not infantino. If nobody knows when Rashford is going to hurtle upfield, least of all himself, then the rest of the team must 'cover back' to allow for this and the other team must 'sit back' in case of it. Brilliantine!

The only real sin in these "originals" is continually running offside

I have to say, despite England being constantly urged to 'get up the park' and other teams equally committed to 'pressing' them back, this has not been a problem. Nor in the tournament generally, a development I put down to hair trigger VAR-consciousness. (And a good thing too, anyone remember how Nottingham Forest were able to win so many European Cups?)

missing sitters

This has definitely been a tournament feature though not an England feature -- which I put down to England not creating many chances, sitting or otherwise. However we must accept that, during the average English season, Rashford serves up more missed chances than he does hot dinners! (© Tommy Trinder).

not passing to teammates in better positions, you just have to balance this against their goals.

Especially as there won't be any of his team mates anywhere near him at the time. You've sold him to me as far as I'm concerned. I'm going to have to come up with some noble epithet for him. Something Classical, I fancy...

Marcus is marmite. Harry is ketchup.

Oh, English breakfast condiments. Yes, much better. Though surely Harry is Roses' Lime Marmalade ... but we throw the competition open. Second prize: a ticket for the Third Place Final. France v Argentina.
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Mick Harper
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First prize: staying at home for the Pakistan v England test highlights. We've discovered what we've all been missing during the dark days of Pakistan domestic instability. Some good old fashioned test match pitches where nations battle it out for five days before declaring it all square and moving on to resume the quest for victory in the next dust bowl. Even Alexander the Great had to eventually call it a score-draw and go home none the wiser.

Though we have at least, and at last, discovered an England top three worthy of the name. To lead our phalanx, if you will

Crawley, Duckett, Pope

Now all we have to do is find a Rawalpindi groundsman with leave to remain.
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Mick Harper
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A long interview on Channel 4 News with 'Britain's first Muslim woman referee" and very informative and entertaining it was too. But one couldn't help noticing that news values were not entirely to the fore.

Item: the interviewee was garbed in full head and body coverall. We were surely entitled to know what she wears on the pitch. Does a hijab affect the carrying out of her duties? Peripheral vision is all in the back-trotting life of the soccer ref. Does she wear shorts? If not, she'd be the only one on the pitch, or beside the pitch, not to be. Not, no doubt, deal breakers but ... relevant.

Item: Her parents had been doubtful at first but are now 'enthusiastic'. "No, they haven't actually come to watch me officiate as yet." Not that enthusiastic would be my judgement. Again, maybe worth mentioning for the benefit of Muslim would-be female referees.

Item: "And would you like to be the first female referee of a Premiership match?" You can guess her answer to that but since we weren't vouchsafed at what level she is a referee now (there are ten grades) we were not able to judge the prospects as to whether it will be her. Still, well done that researcher for finding her. Them. Or maybe just her, that was something else Channel 4 News failed to enlighten us about.
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Mick Harper
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Let's agree on one thing. If wicketkeeper Pope had not dropped a chance when the Pakistani opener was in single figures he probably wouldn't have gone on to post a two hundred run opening partnership and England would have the First Test, and hence in all probability, the series, wrapped up by now.

Let's agree another thing. When a batsman is playing back to a keeper standing up, the time twixt nick and gloves (eighteen inches at fifty-five miles an hour) is too short for any keeper to actually react in any way. It either goes in or he coughs it. When the ball isn't turning and it it takes VAR to reveal there was nick in the first place, it's case closed, irrespective of the quality of the keeper. (Pope is mysteriously standing in for the regular chap.) Certainly, after a couple of hundred further overs of spin, Pope never managed to spill another ball.

Conclusion: Imran Khan had briefed the High Commissioner.
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Mick Harper
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Money Where Mouth Is Time

If Gareth plays three at the back and Jordan Henderson, England will flourish since he will have inadvertently placed virtually half the team 'at the back' as I have constantly urged upon him. The actual make up of the team (Henderson apart) does not particularly matter.

I do not say 'win' -- AE does not permit judgement by results in the near term -- I say flourish. If he sticks to his usual system, even playing his best combination of players will not matter. They will disflourish.
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Mick Harper
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He played two at the back and had 'pushed Henderson forward' so England were rubbish for forty minutes, lucky for five minutes, and coasted for forty-five minutes. African champions? Blimey, what happened to 'an African nation will win the world cup in thirty years'. The Africans in the French team will have seen us off after thirty minutes.

All we can do is sigh and look to personnel changes. I say it again, though tears course down my veins, that Saka is not robust enough (yet) to start against big-time opposition. Especially not if the even more gracile, but necessary, Foden is on the other flank. Personally I'd replace Saka with Alexander-Arnold -- it'd be like Hoddle on the wing -- but that ain't gonna happen. England's central defence is an accident waiting to be crucified by any team left in the competition. The overall fluidity will have Wenger purring in his grave.

But, and I say it again, our overall quality rules nothing out.
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Mick Harper
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The way to look at it, I suppose, is to ask, "Are France quaking in their boots?" And the answer is the encouraging, 'Non.' [No.] Why encouraging? Because France relies on its stars'n'flair and while they would relatively quake at the prospect of playing an even starrier and flairier side, notably Brazil, England are petit-déjeuner.

At first blush, they are fully justified in this belief because England not only lack stars and flair, they lack system. On the other hand, playing a team unconcerned playing their team probably means France will not 'come at them'. Can you really see Giroud and Mbappé putting in a shift? Didier Déschamps was not known as the water-carrier (in English, 'big girl's blouse') for nothing.

What France don't realise is that man-for-man, and sans Pogba and Benzema, England are starrier and flairier than they are -- count the number of players not playing in the toppermost reaches of the Premiership or foreign equivalent if they don't believe me -- and left to their own devices the English will discover this for themselves. The Big Question is therefore, "Will Southgate leave them to their own devices?"
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Mick Harper
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count the number of players not playing in the toppermost reaches of the Premiership or foreign equivalent

Consider, if only because they are direct comparisons, goalies and strikers. Both England and France have first choice Big Six goalkeepers, Ramsdale and Lloris respectively. England don't even play theirs, they prefer Pickford. Quite properly in my opinion and nobody would argue that Lloris is exactly at the top of his game.

Who would you prefer, Kane or Benzema? No question, Benzema, but they're both Big Six or equivalent. Who would you prefer, Kane or Giroud? No question because Giroud is proven not to be Big Six material. Not even in his prime at Arsenal, not even in his decline at Chelsea, not even in his dotage wherever he is now. Lens? You'd need one. [© Tommy Trindaire]

I could go on but I'd run into the central defences so I'd better not. Walls have ears. The AEL is not exactly a stranger when it comes to social media in the dressing room. Both dressing rooms.
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Mick Harper
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Gianni Infantino attended the annual Emir Sheikh Tamin bin Hamad Al'Thani Anti-Corruption Awards ceremony in Qatar last night but only got shortlisted for the Big One, the one they all want to win. Ironist of the Year.
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Grant



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Used to watch Giroud at the Arse eight years ago and I couldn’t work out why he was in the team. After France’s World Cup I assumed he must bring something to the team I couldn’t see. But now he’s 36 for goodness’ sake.

We really shouldn’t worry too much about France. It’s a 50/50 game
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