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Mick Harper
Site Admin
In: London
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I have to nick into Sainsbury's on my way to Tesco. Why? Because Tesco are so markedly superior of course. Oh, I see, you mean why do I have to nick into Sainsbury's? You should have said. Well, it's because their bread is gr-r-r-reat and Tesco's is r-r-r-rubbish.
I know what you're going to ask next because I've been asking the same question myself for years. Why don't Tesco just nick into Sainsbury, buy their bread and then offer it for sale to us Tesco marks with a mark up? Who the hell knows the price of bread anyway? Only Tory MP's due to appear on Any Questions? Would we even care if we did? We'll willingly pay an extra 25p to avoid having to nick into Sainsbury's, wouldn't we?
As to why Tesco doesn't do that, my guess is they don't want our cup to overfloweth.
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Grant
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My last two holidays in France surprised me when I discovered that the very best local boulangerie artisanale was Lidl. Their croissants were half the price of the independent bakers and tasted better. The company were clearly using the bakery as a loss leader.
I suspect that either Sainsbury does the same, or they feel they have to spend more on making bread to show that they are a notch up in taste over Tesco. After all, the plebs are happy with Mother's Pride.
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Mick Harper
Site Admin
In: London
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| My last two holidays in France surprised me when I discovered that the very best local boulangerie artisanale was Lidl. Their croissants were half the price of the independent bakers and tasted better. The company were clearly using the bakery as a loss leader. |
All French bread products are made in the expectation that 'the little woman' will shop in the market every day. This is discovered by every British/French exchange schoolchild when, after spending a fortnight in bread heaven, brings a baguette and some croissants home to show mummy how life could be and discovers to his or her chagrin they're inedible by the time he or she reaches home and hearth.
| I suspect that either Sainsbury does the same, or they feel they have to spend more on making bread to show that they are a notch up in taste over Tesco. |
I doubt the most successful food retailer in the world would allow its chief rival in the British market to steal such a march. It has nothing to do with price, it is an AE thing: British Tesco has a blind spot and nobody knows why.
| After all, the plebs are happy with Mother's Pride. |
They certainly would be except that due to a combination of fashion and legislation, this delicious product is unavailable. The nearest thing you can get to early Mother's Pride nowadays is a Tesco economy white sliced which I buy weekly if available -- it often isn't.
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Mick Harper
Site Admin
In: London
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The Barclay Brothers have finally lost control of the Telegraph Newspaper Group and the receiver has been called in. I'm not saying me holding the Brothers up to ridicule for their unMegalithic practices on Sark in my famous Glastonbury Lecture of 2013, triggered this fall from grace but it was surely when the rot set in.
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Mick Harper
Site Admin
In: London
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aaa started following you
8 minutes ago
aaa
clapped for Part of being a member of the Golden Generation was to pull the ladder up to make sure the…
8 minutes ago
bbb + 3 others
clapped for China? It's the most often conquered country in history.
about 1 hour ago
ccc
clapped for You've spotted our cunning plan. We make sure to live in a country nobody else would want to.
about 3 hours ago
ddd
clapped for Last time I looked there were thirteen colonies. Did I miss something?
about 9 hours ago
eee
clapped for The Beatles, the Stones and Bob Dylan all asked me to join them at various times but I was washing…
about 11 hours ago
fff
responded to China? It's the most often conquered country in history.
about 12 hours ago |
That's just today. But no-one will look at my damn stories. I don't mean clap them, I don't mean read them, I mean just open them. I've got forty or so followers, who get told of each one but two actually looking at them is something to be thankful for. It's a very weird site.
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Mick Harper
Site Admin
In: London
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I invented a whole new genre of game yesterday made possible by Zoom (I had better tell something approximating the truth because Hatty was present). One of the family (out of a dozen or so peripatetic attendees) had sent in twenty words taken randomly from Genesis which we had to use to construct an alternate Creation story. My sister used ChatGPT to come up with a weird one. I found I couldn't (God Complex, my therapist said) so I devised twenty questions for the mob to answer, and to which the twenty words were the answers. That's new? I hear you scoff.
Well, unusual, but the point is Zoom allows the twenty words to be on the collective Zoom screen but people can't cross them off so each question (barked out by me) requires them to scan all the words each time. First person who says the correct answer gets a point. While each question gets answered fast enough to avoid longueurs, it's hesitant enough for the first responder to be identifiable and rewarded. Took about half an hour all in and was a roaring success. (I've been in need of one for some time both family-wise and professionally-wise.)
As you'll be dying to have a go impressing your own families, here's some tips. The twenty questions should be a mix of general knowledge and humorous family references, So, for instance, these are the words on the screen, taken from Genesis (Ishmael, could you check?)
created
Man
seventh day
life
Tigris
serpent
fruit
fig leaves
Woman
skins
covenant
offering
vengeance
righteous
Ark
floodgates
raven
Canaanite
language
a great nation |
Some of the questions were
What shall ye open?
What do you wrap round dope?
What do you wrap round privates?
What animal comes to mind when you hear the words Peter Harper?
What shall be mine? saith Mick Harper
The difference between England and Scotland.
What was Uncle Benjie?
What sentence would Pete get if I had my way?
It’s by de Kooning
Hippies addressing one another
To which, if you are struggling, the answers are flood gates, skins, fig leaves, serpent, vengeance, a great nation, fruit, life, Woman, Man.
                   
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Mick Harper
Site Admin
In: London
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Hey, I beat my medium record and got 103 views and ten fans for a response. It all started with this
And he instanced Afghanistan, China, India, North Korea, Russia and Canada, so there was need for Ishmael to hide out in Tanzania after all. I put in what I thought was a fairly routine reply (expecting one view if I was lucky)
China? It's the most often conquered country in history. Don't be fooled just because the conquerors pretend to be a new dynasty of Chinese emperors.
I know it's unfashionable but the least conquered country in history is England. |
That's the one that beat all the records. Who da guessed? Not this dude
| Anton Shelepov wrote: | | What is there to gain by conquering England? :) Much .. once on it's knees, the English elite will stop meddling in other countries businesses |
| Mick Harper wrote: | | You've spotted our cunning plan. We make sure to live in a country nobody else would want to. |
| Bob Koure wrote: | | 100% agreed on China. I'm still a little surprised that people miss change-of-dynasty = successful-invasion. |
| PS wrote: | I think his point was invasion by white people. Most of the world was a European colony at some point or the other.
Europeans are the most and only, warlike people many people know. Although that is incorrect. |
| Mick Harper wrote: | | I think it is entirely correct. And by a very wide margin. |
| PS wrote: | | Hmm. History would point out that Mongols, Japanese and Iranians have been just as prolific invaders. But if you say so. |
| Mick Harper wrote: | | Mongols? One shot wonders (maybe two/three). Japanese? How the hell did they get in? 1894, 1931-42 is all I know about. Iranians, I'll accept. |
| PS wrote: | Since I live in Asia, I count Indian mongol invasion as invasion of India too. So taimur lang, ghazni, the huns were also invaders in our book.
Same for Japs, they have a history of expansion in the eastern part or Asia, not India, but the rest of Korea, China, south east Asia.
History is longer than the last few centuries. |
This one will run and run. But without me, I think.
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Mick Harper
Site Admin
In: London
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Phew! It's like a furnace out there. I must turn down the thermostat in the kitchen.
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Mick Harper
Site Admin
In: London
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Provide A Punchline Competition
This arrived in my medium bag of goodies
I thought an Isa was something you put aside for your pension but, no, she's an indefatigable compiler of musical lists.
1. Bad Was Originally Planned As A Duet Between Michael Jackson And Prince
2. Paul McCartney And John Lennon Almost Reunited On Saturday Night Live
3. A Mega Album From The Beatles, Rolling Stones, and Bob Dylan
4. Paul McCartney Missed Out On An Album With Jimi Hendrix, Miles Davis, And Tony Williams
5. A Supergroup Made Up Of Led Zeppelin And Yes |
Being a bit showbizzy myself, I thought I'd better add one of my own
| Mick Harper wrote: | | The Beatles, the Stones and Bob Dylan all asked me to join them at various times but I was washing my hair. |
This got some claps -- including to my relief from Isa herself, people can be touchy -- but I was dissatisfied with the ending. For those of you lacking my social life, this is the normal reply to "Dya wanna go to the flicks Satdee?" "No, sorry, I'm washing my hair." It may not be standard in America and nor was my alternative "... but my mum said I had to do my O-levels first."
So I shall be needing others for future similar occasions. £2 for every one published. Or more if you can afford it.
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Mick Harper
Site Admin
In: London
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I have just had a demo pass in front of me. Ten yards away, on the pavement, my side of Ladbroke Grove. Who were they and what were they protesting about? They were shouting "What do we want?" in unison but I could not make out what they wanted because that part seemed to be not entirely agreed. They were carrying flags that might have been Turkish, but I'm not sure. I really should have bestirred myself to find out -- it's the least they deserved for their efforts -- but ennui is ennui when all's said and done.
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Mick Harper
Site Admin
In: London
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I oppose this idea that women's chief purpose is to nag you into cleaning up the place from time to time. They have many qualities in their own right. But men are utterly pointless, I'd have to agree with you there.
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Mick Harper
Site Admin
In: London
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| At what point ought one to be sufficiently discouraged to conclude you may be in the wrong line and should seek something likely to be more rewarding? |
I will deal with something I don't know about rather than something I do, to avoid 'the tyranny of knowledge'. Marriage.
It's a well known scientific fact that two human beings cannot live together in harmony for more than a certain time. That time normally being less than the lifetime of one of them. Hence all marriages (I'm including similar but less formal arrangements) will arrive at a point when one or other partner (not both except by a statistical freak) will have to ask him or herself, "At what point ought I to be sufficiently discouraged to conclude I am with the wrong partner and should seek someone likely to be more rewarding."
I ask this question not in a spirit of enquiry or helpfulness but to stop me writing another self-pitying whine about my lack of professional success.
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Mick Harper
Site Admin
In: London
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My latest followers on medium
Your NativeFriend Huetar Nation Brown Native American Writer Visual Artist
Matty Adams I write about my three loves: parenting, heavy metal and words.
Serena Riversong Passionate advocate igniting self-expression, empowering others on
transformative journeys of growth and empowerment. Join me on this odyssey of self-discovery.
Sunday John I am passionate about writing and sharing the message of God's love.
Through my writing, I strive to inspire others to develop a deeper relationship with God |
Judge not, lest ye be judged.
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Mick Harper
Site Admin
In: London
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Soon the days will be drawing in. What kind of a summer has it been? Quiet, I would say. Though you may not have been so lucky where you are.
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Mick Harper
Site Admin
In: London
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Some sporting type was shown attending some swanky do, dressed to the nines, and the admiring bloke in the studio finished with, "But he's wearing a clip-on bowtie. You can always tell -- nobody can tie a bowtie that perfectly." As someone who used to have to wear a (clip-on) bowtie every night as part of his casino duties, this got me to wondering. Why don't they make clip-on bowties to look imperfectly-tied?
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