AE on Telly News (NEW CONCEPTS)

[Ishmael]

[Mick Harper]

I doubt it since it is part of the human condition. As fine a body of folk as you would wish to meet.

[Mick Harper]

High Score (Netflix)

This highly recommended series on the history of computer games got me thinking about my own history of computer games. I am sort of co-eval with them. I played the reputedly first one (Space War!) on a large computer (there were no other kinds) at the University of Michigan in the sixties. But then took my place amidst the rank-and-file being temporarily entranced by Pong, sneered at everything else, became hooked on Civilisation for a year, and that's pretty much it.

If I had been born later, when being a computer nerd was not necessarily part of the deal, I would probably be playing them instead of writing this. Even involved professionally in the industry maybe. So how have the rest of you fared with this insidiously ruinous part of our/their everyday lives?

[Mick Harper]

Air Crash Investigation "Massacre Over The Mediterranean" (National Geographic)

This is a good illustration of our The Truth is Always Boring vs People Much Prefer Excitement. The basics

[Mick Harper]

Chocolat (Sony Movies)

Are we allowed to watch Harvey Weinstein films yet? I noticed it's awfully difficult to find his name attached to anything when looking up some details. An excellent film-maker eg Chocolat but I suppose that's a bit like admiring Joseph Goebbels as a diarist. I wonder what Juliette Binoche had to do to get the lead.

But what I wanted to alert you to was that French church services are identical to English ones. Everyone sings hymns, a vicar (dressed the same) gives a sermon that everyone nods along to, the lord of the manor has his own pew at the front., the church is unadorned, not a sniff of incense. No choirboys were harmed in the making of this movie, there weren't any. Did we all die for this?

[Wile E. Coyote]

Credits roll "Bandish Bandits", a tale of musical and youthful love set in India. It's brilliantly simple, a staggeringly beautiful leggy girl into techno-pop, You tubing and modernity, meets a tall, handsome hometown guy, who is into traditional classical Indian singing. She is into instant fame, he trains religiously 8 hours a day under wise old time master. A colourful meeting takes place. Will there be love? Can they overcome both personal and musical differences? Of course they will. Probably in 6 seasons' time.

It ticks every box for a mega global hit.

It's on Amazon.

Much gnashing of teeth at BBC, who are trying to produce a revamped trendy Strictly Covid Special. Oh dear, darlings, others are doing this globalisation thingy so much better.

[Mick Harper]

I should like to comment on Bollywood, far and away and for many years the biggest source of movies on this our fair earth. They are bleedin' awful. I don't mean in the sense of 'not being my particular cup of tea', as Indians are wont to say, but in the sense of Carry On films. Formulaic to the point of destroying any possibilities of development other than bigger, brasher, more colourful, more (by the sound of Wiley's account) up to date but inimical to anything that we in the West would understand as an art form. Even a popular art form.

Though I am sure there are good and bad Bollywood epics just as there are good and bad Carry On films, it would be a start if Bollywood epics were a genre rather than the main and only item at the feast. One thing I noted though was

[Mick Harper]

Borgen (Netflix)

We all loved this when it was on terrestrial TV in weekly dollops (it's the one about the Danish woman prime minister) but now it is on Netflix. I have found, for some reason, that rewatching these fondly remembered series (eg the Norwegian one about being occupied by Russia) on Netflix is usually an unsatisfactory exercise. But this one, Netflix says, has "New dubbing" -- again usually unsatisfactory but marginally better than reading subtitles. So I am going to give it a fair whirl and will report back.

[Wile E. Coyote]

Don't know, guess all movies that seek a large audience are formulaic, that is how you get a large audience. I suppose the difference is that Hollywood also produces vanity movies, designed to win the actors, and directors awards. The scripts for these vanity projects are developed from successful or award-winning novels, such was the case with Forest Gump, Schindler's List, 12 Years a Slave and Moonlight. The public wisely steers well clear of these vanity projects unless, that is, the film gets a gong. Still, if they do end up going, they usually leave disappointed, as most novels can't be read in an hour and 40 minutes so don't translate well.

Comics are more visual, shorter and translate better to screen, so you get superhero franchises. What is the difference between a Hollywood Super Hero and a Bollywood Hero? They are both boy meets girl, but one substitutes implausible action scenes, (normally saving the world) whilst one substitutes implausible romantic songs, (he saves her) for what would actually have been sex.

Action...Girl looks longingly into boy's eyes, they are either interrupted by an explosion (Hollywood) or a dance number (Bollywood). Your quirky, clever, art movies will show the explicit sex, as they don't have the budgets for CGI or can't afford the extras for the musical numbers. This actually guarantees them a small sizable adult audience that prefers not to be caught downloading porn providing, that is, they are willing to endure a director heavily referencing older and better movies.

The porn industry is as big as Hollywood, but you would not want to discuss this at your dinner party.

[Mick Harper]

[Mick Harper]

Borgen is proving instructive. First about Netflix. What kind of a weird world-dominating outfit can go to all the trouble of organising a dubbed version when, on tuning in, you get the version with subtitles. You then have to guess there might be a dubbed version; you must then guess there is a mechanism somewhere for finding out, you can then select the English audio option, you then have to go back and turn off the English subtitles option.

Then, and this is not Netflix's fault, you find you can't hear what they are saying because you've got a very old Massey-Ferguson telly and while you've investigated the possibility of buying one of those sound enhancing box thingies you quickly realised that you wouldn't be up to the technical demands of installing it. But, because you are an AE-ist, you bring up the menu on your telly (it's quite modern, just cheap) and choose the Music sound option and everything comes out clear as a bell.

Now, why is Borgen good and Norway bad? Because Borgen is essentially soap opera and you can't remember a thing about it, it's like watching it from new. Norway was science-fiction and you can remember all the shocks from before and there isn't much else.

I'm like Clive James, only more concise. And British to the core.

[Mick Harper]

The Dark Side of Green Energy (Al-Jazeera)

A quite maddening inabilty to distinguish between first order and second order problems. The whole point of green energy is to prevent global warming. Global warming is caused by using fossil fuels for energy. It doesn't matter whether you buy into these propositions, that was what the programme was buying into.

So the whole programme is devoted to the pollution caused by the switchover, especially the increased need for rare elements and copper that electric cars, wind turbines etc etc use. Now this is, for sure, serious and worth making a programme about. But compared to the earth burning to a crisp, the fact that a Chinese city has a black lake or water supplies for Chilean copper mines is denuding other Chileans of water is not worth making a programme about.

[Mick Harper]

Book of the Week "Ramble Book" by Adam Buxton (Radio 4)

One of our finest intellectuals.

[Mick Harper]

All Creatures Great and Small (Channel 5)

Will this fill the yearning chasm in all our hearts left by Doc Marten? Early days yet. I am getting used to Janet being thirty years younger and called something else. The Hovis aspects are well done but already the people are pushing the animals to the margin. When are the TV companies going to understand? We are not interested in people. We have enough of them at home.

[Mick Harper]

How We Tamed the Cat and Dog (BBC4)

We've got quite enough of them at home.