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The Importance of Sport (NEW CONCEPTS)
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Mick Harper
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Brentford 1 Man City 0
Arsenal 5 Wolves 0


A fair summing up of the season gone by. How will it be remembered? Not for Man City (what's new?) but for Arsenal (they're new). The usual suspects were very, very patchy. Chelsea, Liverpool and Spurs were hardly in it, only Manchester United improved and then only from very poor to fairly poor. Newcastle are now usual suspects.

Despite spirited efforts by ex-giants Aston Villa (the MotD bloke reminded us, "Their best showing since they beat Bayern Munich to lift the European Cup") and ex-tiddlers -- Brentford, Brighton and Fulham -- there was no evidence of a changing of the guard. Next season all will be put right. Or wrong depending on where you live and whether you vote for progressive parties. Not that anyone can tell who they are nowadays. All shades will welcome Everton staying up. What's right is right. Though Luton in place of Leicester and Leeds is just plain wrong.

All in all, a good but not a vintage year.
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Mick Harper
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3.5 million girls and women play football in England Channel 4 News

This is alarming in terms of the balance of power but it all depends what they mean. If they're talking about playground football there's not much to worry about. In my young day there were three point five million boys picking sides in Catford alone. But I hang round a fair few girls' playgrounds and I see very little evidence of it.
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Grant



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The unspoken reality is that serious women's football is largely a sapphic endeavour.

A few weeks ago there was a classic hand-wringing article in the Guardian asking why there were so few black women players. The answer was ignored by the journalist: black girls quite like to be athletes or netball players but they don't want anyone to think they are lesbians.
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Mick Harper
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I live in a country of three point five million lesbians? That explains my disastrous relationship record.
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Mick Harper
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England v Ireland

For those people who bellyache that playing a test match against Ireland is poor preparation for an Ashes series, I have only one word. Airmiles.
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Mick Harper
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For those people who bellyache about Zak Crawley opening for England, I have only one word. Correct.
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Wile E. Coyote


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Mick Harper wrote:
England v Ireland

For those people who bellyache that playing a test match against Ireland is poor preparation for an Ashes series.


Smart thinking. We need to fully prepare for the enemy using the "reverse paddle". The critics don't realise the only difference is that Australia will be trying it on the second day at Lords at 537-4, rather than Ireland trying it on the first at 53-4.
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Wile E. Coyote


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Mount for Maguire seems like a fair swap to me. Maybe make it conditional on Harry getting back from his holiday. Other than that I can't see what the problem is. I mean it's not like they will become first down on the teamsheet for their new clubs, it's a case of good squad players that will fill in when otheres lose form, are tired or are injured. Will Mount ever boss a midfield, no. Should you ever organise a defence around Maguire, no. It's a case of two English players who get name checked when their teams win, basically because they are English internationals, but unlike, say, a Gerard or a Terry, do not inspire. Good without being great. It's about £20-£30 million swap deal.
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Mick Harper
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This was a new one on me and since I don't trust you further than Lampard's managerial career -- oops, I see he's out and Pochettino's in -- I googled 'mount for maguire' and discovered there's a Mount Maguire. So thanks for that. One lives, one learns. But you're right, Maguire's career never recovered from his disgracefully unjust arrest in Greece. But then that in itself shows a character flaw, does it not? No, you're quite wrong, he played some of his best football on his return, it's just time, tide and the pressing game has caught up with him.

When you've just broken the bank buying a whole new team and the last broke-the-bank team is still in residence, where do you turn to? Man Utd cast offs, natürlich. Perhaps they'll take Phil Jones as part of the package and play two old lions at the heart of the defence. Grrr...
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Wile E. Coyote


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If ten Hag's devils win today, then this will be forgotten.

2021 points 74, final position 2, Ole Gunnar Solskjaer

2023 points 75, final position 3, Eric Ten Hag

They are really no better. All that happened was they mistakenly signed Ronaldo at the end of 2021, which pissed off their younger players and cost Solskjaer his job.
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Mick Harper
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I am astonished by those stats. Just goes to show the truth of 'never judge by results'. Do you think Ronaldo was Solskjaer's decision though?

If ten Hag's devils win today, then this will be forgotten.

I don't think so. If they lose it will make no difference. He's got them into the Champions' League. Though I don't think not doing so would have made any difference either. It's a rebuilding job, innit? Nor, in my opinion, should it. The big difference between ETH and OGS (like serial killers, they always have three names) is that one has a successful track record and the other didn't. If the Haaganah fails there's something wrong with United, when Baby Face failed it was down to him.
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Mick Harper
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The scene is set. Thirty heads of state. Fifty other nations have sent representatives. The great and good of Turkey are arrayed. Yes indeedy, it's President Erdogan being sworn in for another term as Suleiman the Magnificent. But who's this I spy. Step forward, or rather remain seated in your place of honour, Mesut Özil, late of Arsenal FC. Why is he there? Has Germany sent him as their representative? No.

Erdogan = the new force in European politics
Arsenal = the new force in European football
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Wile E. Coyote


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"I am very proud of the team, we conceded two soft goals, but there were a lot of positives for the next season."

If they concede an average of two soft goals each game next year, they will be relegated.
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Mick Harper
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It is a matter of physics that a spin bowler will get more turn the more perpendicularly the ball arrives in front of the batsman. It is a matter of geometry that this has to be accomplished within twenty-two yards and with a velocity that doesn't give the batsman time to step out and hit it on the full. It is a matter of Applied Epistemology that the spinner can obviate all this by bowling from way behind his own stumps. This is so novel a suggestion it is not addressed by the laws of cricket.

It may be, I haven't checked.
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Mick Harper
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If they concede an average of two soft goals each game next year, they will be relegated.

It means De Gea will definitely be going this summer but Man Utd will find replacing him no easy matter. It doesn't matter how much you pay for foreign imports there is no guarantee they will give high-priced performances in the uniquely hurly-burly of the Premiership. Promising lower division performers are equally unpredictable when they step up. And Man Utd's style, unlike say Man City's, requires a very good goalie. I am greatly relieved that we pulled the Ramsdale plum out of the dogheap, and he was supposed to be only a back-up.
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