Herd (NEW CONCEPTS)

[Wile E. Coyote]

The herd is fearsome, collectively, it is just not thousands of tons of fresh meat but highly dangerous horn and hoof. You really don't want to take it head on. Those beady little eyes see you, you crouch lower, but there is not much cover in the open savannah. Stampede!

[Wile E. Coyote]

That wasn't too sucessful. There has to be a better way. The little ones are after all very hungry. Let's try from the buttock end. Stealth is all important as we close in. Aha, getting closer this time! Inching forward. Just need to pick up speed for the final strike. Whoops. Spotted. The herd runs. Still, this is much more like it. The stampede is not heading towards me this time. I have learned from painful experience. This was actually fun. Did I catch anything? No. Are the little ones still hungry? Yes. When they are hungry, do they make a lot of noise? Really? I must try and do better. This is trickier than expected.

[Wile E. Coyote]

Ok, folks we have now tracked the herd for a few days. We are carefully watching and learning. The thing about herds is they are collectively impressive but individually unimpressive, clearly not "king of the jungle" material like moi. If only I could separate one from the rest. Perhaps the scraggy one, with the limp?

[Wile E. Coyote]

Grrr. Young stomachs full. Silence, except for the odd belch and fart. Mission accomplished. Still, that buffalo didn't taste the best, odd that, and better half keeps reminding me that the the herd will now be stronger and more dangerous next time as I have eliminated its weakest link. Tad ungrateful if you ask me. Still, time for a nap. You can overthink these things.

[Mick Harper]

I have always wondered why wildebeest or whatever don't just stand there when predators are about. They don't even have to be in a phalanx with horns pointing out or anything like that since as soon as a lion pounces on one of them they can just all go over and stomp on the lion. Or lions. They won't be trying that again.

It's not as if wildebeest are particularly afraid of lions. One of lions' tricks is to feign injury which leads to wildebeest trying to butt him (of course, her) to death. Cue end of wildebeest. It appears that evolution can pay attention to the fact that wildebeest need lions to kill them in order to keep wildebeest numbers down to the carrying capacity of the savannah. Clever evolution!

[Wile E. Coyote]

It is a bit of a bummer. What I think of as an interesting paradox, the herd will now be stronger and more dangerous next time, as I have eliminated its weakest link, my mrs regards as a clear faliure of my Applied Hunting Skills, meaning I am unlikely to ever challenge "that great circle of life". Worse, as you state, she is now bringing home really tasty snacks.

It is kind of you to try but I clearly need more help than your feigning dead, you can't swag and brag about that to the kids.