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The Flu (Health)
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Mick Harper
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In: London
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The most obvious application of the doctrine currently is in all matters of race. The Black Lives Matter and related campaigns will play themselves out and result in the status quo ante for blacks and more scratching of furrowed brows among liberals. "How can we be even nicer? It's all the fault of those nasty non-liberals." When it comes to immigration, the problem becomes truly insoluble because liberals have to be nice to all immigrants which means by definition they may not discriminate between categories of immigrants. Since Britain needs tons of immigrants but is not allowed to pick and choose for itself, this means setting up a de facto freestyle obstacle race to see who gets here:

1. Young males in third world countries pay huge sums to criminal gangs of people-smugglers
2. They undertake unspeakably arduous journeys from their country of origin to wherever is the current European jumping off point i.e. opposite to wherever European niceness happens currently to be
3. Since neither the jumping-off country nor Europe wants them, there will be an indefinite period in some sort of detention camp or they just hang about in dire conditions
4. More money is paid and eventually they will risk life and limb crossing some sea or other and hope they get rescued by a nice charity with good lines of communication to some nice Europeans who will let them land
5. If all goes well they will end up indefinitely either in a European detention camp or just hang about in dire conditions
6. Eventually niceness will prevail and they will be allowed to make their way to the jumping off point for Britain (not particularly nice but lacking ID cards) and hang about there indefinitely in dire conditions
7. If all goes well they will reach Britain and a British detention camp or they will hang about in dire conditions
8. Niceness demands they are let out eventually to live the desperate lives of undocumented and unwanted people not allowed to work but given subsistence handouts so they will 'indefinitely remain'
9. If all goes well they will supplement this by carrying out badly paid but vital tasks for nice British liberals
10. Who will say to one another, "What would we do without them? And to think, nasty people are trying to keep them out."
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Mick Harper
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This is another aspect of niceness. The person being nice tends to benefit, the other person not necessarily. Wiley has demonstrated how the niceness of PHE leads to all manner of terrible outcomes for the 'other person' i.e. us.

PHE is in charge of one of the largest organisations in the world, the National Health Service (or 90% of it). Can you imagine any large organisation being 'nice'? You can imagine large organisations that use 'niceness' as a marketing tool -- Marks & Spencer used to do it -- but if Marks & Spencer had a policy of routinely allowing their staff to go home if somebody there was a bit poorly, because M & S was 'nice' like that, there soon wouldn't be a Marks & Spencer. This is not at all the same thing as 'compassionate leave', something all large organisations grant as a matter of routine. It's sound HR practice.

You might think that PHE itself was not benefiting -- Wiley shows they certainly were not -- but this is what makes niceness so insidious. If anyone criticises PHE, they would say, "Hey, we were just being nice. You got any problems with that?" And of course people don't because PHE is not seen as one of the largest organisations in the world delivering a product, it is seen as 'our NHS', the embodiment of British niceness.

It would be a lot better if it was the health service the British paid for. And, no, I do not mean by cash or via insurance. I mean out of general taxation and free at the point of use. But preferably run by hard-nosed bastards who should be at the top of any large organisation delivering a product.
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Wile E. Coyote


In: Arizona
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I have seen some blogs claiming that in May 50% of hospital beds were empty. Most elective surgery cancelled. Some non elective surgery cancelled. If true this must be causing unnatural deaths.

If Wiley was to run a manifesto on the above policies ie closing 50% of beds, stopping all elective surgery. He would need hospitalisation (but wouldn't be admitted) such would be the outrage.

How long we can keep this up is anyone's guess. We are now warned of a second surge. The idea that you empty hospitals and keep them empty to avoid being overrun, rather than provide the best care for patients who are actually ill in the here and now, and either needed a hospital bed or surgery (according to last years criteria) appears with the benefit of hindsight, a massive error of judgement by the NHS.
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Mick Harper
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In: London
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It should never be forgotten that while the NHS is staffed exclusively by saints and angels and we must all come out of the house to give them a round of applause every now and again, it is also staffed exclusively by human beings who would far rather sit around doing nothing and being paid for it. Like teachers really. All professions are unindicted co-conspirators acting in their own interest. This has to include benefiting the people paying for their services but only as a by-product.
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Wile E. Coyote


In: Arizona
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I will proudly be wearing my mask into a branch of Lloyds bank. My girlfriend Bonnie, is meeting me there. We intend to make a withdrawal.
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Mick Harper
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In: London
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Everyone will be wearing masks. You will find it much more menacing if you are the only person not wearing one. They will be so busy looking at your masklessness they won't be able to give a good description to the police. Taking your dog along to a stick-up is another nice touch. Don't use your Freedom Pass during the getaway, they can track them according to Can't Pay? We'll Take You Away.
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Wile E. Coyote


In: Arizona
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Damn. According to the latest expert, brought on to assess the mask-wearing diktat, we might be putting ourselves at increased risk (!) as we have gone for designer masks with, fancy stitching and coffee filter inserts. We just wanted to look good and give the customers a bit of a extra buzz, but it fails the risk assessment. A better option would be to go the full Ned Kelly, but they haven't got my size on Amazon. Bonnie has opted for tight leathers, mask and snorkel, she looks incredibly hot but it does make shouting instructions difficult. Also, I am not sure it is helping my concentration.
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Chad


In: Ramsbottom
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So another hundred and twenty thousand UK citizens are going to die in the second wave that is due to sweep the nation this winter. Popping into the local shop has suddenly become so dangerous that we must all cover our faces, or feel the full force of the law.

But the government want us all to eat out, to help the hospitality industry... Fat chance.

You can't scare people shitless and boost the economy.
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Wile E. Coyote


In: Arizona
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Chad wrote:
So another hundred and twenty thousand UK citizens are going to die in the second wave that is due to sweep the nation this winter.


We have been told to plan for September spike, but the latest buzz is December, of course it might be March next year... but then again could it be as late as June?

Fuck, just noticed we are then back to September.

Persistent little bugger.
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Mick Harper
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In: London
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Skin rash should be considered key symptom of coronavirus, say scientists

Using data from the Covid Symptom Study app from about 336,000 regular UK users, King's College London researchers found that 8.8% of people testing positive for the disease had experienced a skin rash as part of their symptoms. This was compared with 5.4% of people with a negative test result. "So if you notice a new rash, you should take it seriously by self-isolating and getting tested as soon as possible,." said consultant dermatologist Dr Justine Kluk.

I've heard of false positives but this must be a new low (high).
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Chad


In: Ramsbottom
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I've noticed Wiley's been scratching a lot more than he normally does.
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Wile E. Coyote


In: Arizona
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Don't worry Chad, I have just missed my spot on treatment.
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Wile E. Coyote


In: Arizona
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Public Health England are hitting the airwaves.

We all think we know whose fault these COVID deaths are:

a) The Chinese

b) The Chinese, but it's not polite to mention their nationality

c) Boris Johnston

d) Being over 80, with a respiratory condition, without proper care.

But no.... PHE think it's down to being fat. Covid and being fat is the game changer. This is genius, Britain and America have more fat people so we now have finally reaped the consequences, what we need is of course better health advice. Blimey, we now have tales of patients who are incredibly worried they are fat and going to die, not from a heart attack but Covid.

Anyway, folks, we now arrive at the correct answer to who is to blame in the eyes of the experts.

e) You are. If you had only listened to PHE advice (NB this excludes BAME communities who suffer higher risks from COVID because of health inequalities, which is down to imperialism). So get on your bike, and wear a mask just like the Chinese. If they can do it, so can you. PS. Don't forget your helmet, and don't wobble, you might want to try it with stabilisers, cycling after heavy meals in extreme heat or adverse weather conditions is not recommended. If in doubt consult your GP.
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Chad


In: Ramsbottom
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Separate households will not be allowed to meet indoors in Greater Manchester ... from midnight, the government has announced.

That’s it... this idiot government has gone too far now... they’re starting to get on my tits.
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Chad


In: Ramsbottom
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This is a knee-jerk reaction from the government, when somebody within their ranks realised it was the eve of Eid-al-Adha.

Problem is, boroughs with lower than average infection rates (Rossendale and Wigan) and others with pretty much average rates (Bury, Bolton, Stockport and Tameside) have been lumped in to fill the gaps and make it seem a little less Islamophobic.

P.S. Why does Mat Hancock always look as if he is about to shit himself?
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